An unfortunate accident has caused peace in Giza. The Altoona Mirror is reporting that a man crashed into a Chance Pharaohs Fury at Delgrosso’s Amusement Park in Tipton, PA. Reports say that the man passed out while driving and ended up slamming right into the newly added ride. An officer on the scene said that the man didn’t let up at all, crashing through a gate before wedging his car under the ride platform. Ironically, the driver was on his way to another hospital after breaking his finger. The driver suffered “serious head lacerations” but was conscious after the crash…I guess the impact woke him up? Along with being hospitalized, the driver was also cited for careless driving, ouch!
There is a silver lining to this story however; ancient Egypt historian and self proclaimed psychic Dr. Nigel Duncan claims that the spirits of mummified pharaohs seem “all warm and fuzzy now.” When asked what the hell he was talking about, Duncan elaborated that the pharaohs just didn’t like the blatant commercialization of ancient Egypt. “They likened the car to a giant arrow slung by an Egyptian compatriot…it was one final victory for them!” When asked about the Luxor casino in Las Vegas, Dr. Duncan said, “well, they do make exceptions, I mean have you ever seen the adult revue there? Nothing says ancient Egypt like double D’s!”
Soooo….let’s see what article commenters have to say:
“Too bad it didn’t happen at Lakemont, could have hit every ride in the entire park and only done fifty bucks in damage.”
“His poor decision of not calling paramedics wound up costing him a lot more than he bargained for.”
“You would seriously call 911 for a fractured finger? god help us all!”
“Damn, that “Dr.” Duncan is a quack AND a pervert!”